SOME IMAGES (a poem that loses its way in less than six syllables)
Some images scream out for Photoshopping. They claw their way out of soil and flex their pallid fingers for some Adobe software. Photoshop us, they say, We wants a photoshopping, oy, we've been so blandly unironic for so long now, come on and givvit to us now, fuck with us and expose the hidden silliness of an age! Photoshop us!
So okay then, how about this one?
In order to pleasure your imagination I've removed the text from the panel. Here's what Archie was originally saying: "...reddest, roundest and most inoffensive of Fruits, do not fail to attract the attention of my drunken Mount, drooling not only from Lust for You, perched atop my Buttocks and buttressed by a Pocket, but from a caskful of ripe cider expressed by Your less fortunate fermented Fellows". - Thomas Kyd, Pomeroy I.iv.3-7
Of course, this shouldn't stop you from filling in that text bubble with your own words. Let me know what you come up with. But remember to keep it clean: this page is regularly visited by websavvy five year olds.
A CONCERN
Apparently the Cylons, avatars of mechanized evil and emblem of all that was chillingly red-eyed in the old Battlestar Galactica, aren't robots in the new Battlestar &c. series. They've assumed human form or some such thing. Does this concern you? By which I mean, do you give a rat's ass? It just doesn't seem right to me. What's going to happen with those red scanning LED lights that they had for eyes? Is there an asteroid just full of metal plates and little red diodes? To me the Cylons always looked like a monstrous technological extrapolation of a Casio wristwatch. Now there's A Victoria's Secret model playing a Cylon. Hmmm. I don't mind the change that much, actually, since a) I'll probably never watch the show anyway, b) human Cylons means more humans overall, which is a great boost to recently flagging Soylent industries, and c) it's not like they remade Casablanca in a post-apocalyptic Indian casino or anything. Still, what if Peter Jackson had decided to cast a thoughtful-looking pipe-smoking man in a bathrobe and a cheap toupee as Sauron instead of an evil tower with a blazing eye hung between its cruel spires? Hey, that would have been an improvement. Especially in the climactic scenes of the tower of Barad-Dur collapsing. Instead it could be that guy in a bathrobe standing on the ravaged plain of Mordor, puffing away at his pipe, nodding pensively, and then falling over dead from heart failure. And all the Nazgul would have worn bathrobes and smoked pipes. Imagine a pipe protruding from the darkness of the helmet of the Witch King of Angmar.
I had more to talk about, but this whole Evil Presence of Leisure notion has driven all other thoughts out of my mind.
